this feels like an age where it is Official. i should probably cut my hair to some sort of bob thing. and invest in more breezy, knee-grazing dresses. and only wear cut-off shorts at the beach.
despite this actual real and semi-scary and awakening move into what is legit old age, i can’t help but feel grateful, so fucking grateful for the wonderful women i have in my life, who hold me up and support me and send loving vibes throughout every minute of my day. for my family who cares about everything that happens to me, big or small. for my husband, and the realization that i can barely even bring myself to acknowledge that maybe we made it after all. that at one point, everything was torn away and burned down and nothing went as planned, yet everything somehow did go as planned, because here we are, me thirty six, living in the greatest city in the world, doing work that means a lot to me, along side a partner who believes in the same great future i do, and raising the sweetest, mushiest, silliest, sassiest meatball of a daughter.
whatever happens next – whatever other shoe may drop – i’ll at least have this moment of reflection on my thirty sixth birthday to hold dear, when all was quietly right in an imperfect way in my world.
( fyi, it has now been 36 days since i turned 36, and i am just posting this now. and so it goes.)